Balancing Marriage And Acting
July / August 2010

WITH credits dating back to the original Candid Camera on television Joan Benedict Steiger has lived the artistic life she first dreamed of as a child in Brooklyn – and the dream shows no sign of ending. Her list of stage credits include acclaimed productions of contemporary offerings such as Promises, Promises, The Beauty Queen of Leenane, Collected Stories by Donald Margulies, her two solo shows, Leona (about notorious "Queen of Mean" Leona Helmsley) and the recent The Loves of My Life, based on her own life. On screen, she also co-starred with Don Knotts and Tim Conway in the comedy The Prizefighter. Indeed, perhaps Joan Benedict Steiger’s career is all the more remarkable for having endured through three long-term relationships, to what she describes as "three of the greatest guys in the world." "Both of my husbands, and my lifetime partner Jeremy, were wonderful men who respected me as an actress," she says. "They all died from different forms of cancer, so my memories are sometimes bittersweet, but no regrets." She was only 19 when she met actor Rod Steiger, who took an instant liking to her when they appeared on the same television show together. Though the romance with Rod was short-lived, given their respective dedication to pursuing their careers, Joan soon found herself in love with leading stage actor John Myhers. "He toured in The Sound of Music for three years as Captain von Trapp, and I would take time off to travel with him," she says. Settling in a home near Sunset Plaza in the Hollywood Hills, their marriage lasted thirty years before Myhers’ passing. Rod and Joan found each other again in the late 1990s. Rod had heard rave reviews of some of Joan’s stage work. "I got a call from him out of the blue. He’d been at a party where someone had mentioned me, and we got together again after all those years." Joan and Rod were nearly inseparable for the final years of his life, becoming creative partners as well as spouses. "Rod was very impressed with my acting. Whenever a script would arrive at the house, he’d ask me to read it for my feedback, then he’d say, ‘Did you pick out your part yet?’" They appeared in two films together, A Month of Sundays and the telefilm The Flying Dutchman. After a long life marked by tremendous highs and crushing lows – Steiger acknowledged suffering from chronic depression for much of his professional career – the Academy Award winning actor seemed to find new confidence and peace with his newly rediscovered love. Steiger’s passing in 2002 was a devastating loss, but another friend from long ago was able to fill some of the void. Actor Jeremy Slate, a veteran of over 80 films and television shows dating back to 1959, was Joan’s partner until his passing in 2006. "They were all actors, writers, directors, brilliant, funny men," Joan says of the men who captured her heart. Perhaps one of Joan’s most unusual jobs is one where she was asked to "fill in" – in a manner of speaking – for a Hollywood legend. MGM was preparing to make Butterfield 8 starring Elizabeth Taylor. She was reluctant to cooperate because she was eager to begin work on Cleopatra. MGM wanted to shoot the film in New York and she wanted to stay in Los Angeles. Joan was asked if she could go to New York to rehearse the film, playing Taylor’s part. Joan worked for weeks reading Taylor’s lines, and her dedication paid off when she was awarded a small part (a single line) in the film – for which she still earns residuals. The role won Taylor her only Academy Award, but curiously, their paths would cross again years later through their mutual acquaintance with Rod Steiger. "When Rod and I were first dating, he went to see Elizabeth about working on a new project," she says. "This was a period when she wasn’t feeling well, and Rod was one of the people who really encouraged her to get well and return to public life. That led to speculation that Rod and Liz were dating and he was going to be her next husband. Rod and I were on an airplane to Spain, and he liked to read the tabloids. I saw the headline saying Liz and Rod were going to wed. I said, ‘What’s this all about?’ He smiled at me and said, ‘Joan, I’m sitting next to YOU!’"